Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Recap The Bachelorette Australia Episode 5 and BachietteTreat

Episode 5 

Well Channel10 have been working over time with drilling us with advertisements about how this  week its going to be a "Double Date Disaster". So much effort was put into this campaign, that unfortunately for them, my expectations were high. Am I disappointed? All I can say is..

Not only am I disappointed you Channel10, but this date was really, more than anything else...

Davey and Tony were sent on the date to prove their compatibility with BachieQueen. Tony was keen on proving that because he is older, his maturity levels are higher because he knows what he wants, but unfortunately he has no idea what a soulmate is. Quite frankly Tony,

Better get back to the drawing board Tones and fine tune your soul mate definition and quick response skills! All this being said, even though Davey scored the rose it wasn't like he was the better person on the date. Even though he knew what a soul mate was, he still acts like he is playing on a game show rather than winning the heart of BachieQueen and I can't help but think this about Davey each time I see him...

In my last post I thought Davey would make the final two but I am starting to think he won't make it another rose ceremony. No argument he is a fun guy to be around but BachieQueen would have to be prepared to 'mother' him a couple years to wring out the child in him. It seems like Davey's dad's advice is fading in Davey's memory.

Group Date

As BachieQueen wants to be a mother in the near future, she has put her remaining Bachies to the test by having them host a kid's party. Each Bachie has to create a party game that will win the thumbs up from 30 kids and whoever wins over BachieQueen will score dinner time with her. Richie doesn't hesitate and is on top of this straight away...

Richie did a great job and really enjoyed himself and seems to have the kids eating out of his hand. Most of the guys work out what will make the kids happy and do a reasonable job at it,  but poor Dave the Plumber struggles. Something in his brain tells him to create a game where he is the shark and the kids have to run to different posts and try not to be eaten/caught by him..

Poor Dave the Plumber had no clue and as a result the kiddies didn't like his game and in true kiddie fashion Dave the Plumber chucked a tantie and walked off!!

My money was on Richie for the dinner date with BachieQueen. However, I'm not really sure how, but Micheal (the pro soccer player) won BachieQueen's heart and scored the single date. This is how I felt about Micheal on this episode..

BachieQueen made him dinner of ham and cheese toasties which she happened to burn. I don't want to sound like a broken record, but I will! Michael is #disgenuine. He is too agreeable, and trying too hard to be a 'nice' guy that it just reeks of, for lack of a better word, 'disgenuuity".

I'm not saying he is a bad guy, I am just saying he knows he is on "TV" and he is playing, pro soccer style, up to the cameras. Anyway, BachieQueen pashes Micheal and gives him a rose and I'm all like...

The man wears a lady cardigan for crying out loud!!! My daughter has one that looks the same!!

Rose Ceremony 

So Davey and Micheal are safe this round, but I am all like. I can't do my math and have no idea what is going to happen and I'm all like..

Then a familiar voice calms my troubled mind....

Osher in da house! Whoop whoop!! With #Osher, my Captian Obvious, my host with the most and all his divine mathematical knowledge which he so selflessly and generously shares week after week. I know all will be well when he shares that it's one Bachie who will be departing this fine evening. All is well in the world again and its time to say farewell to Kayne but I feel he is like..


I don't usually eat dairy, but when I do, it has to be worth it. Tonight I inhaled one of of these and they are my new favourite, Streets Magnum needs to take notes!

Bachelorette Australia Recap Episodes 3 and 4
Bachelorette Australia Recap Episode 2
Bachelorette Australia Recap Episode 1
The Bachelor Australia Season 3 Finale Recap

Sunday, October 4, 2015

The Bachelorette Australia Ep 3 & 4

Episode 3

If you are on #teamsasha then you would be happy with the single date in this episode. Though it was corny and set up for the two to have more intimate first date moments than is usually expected, the outcome, regardless of how delayed it was, was achieved. No doubt both Sash and BachieQueen are happy, well at least they seem to be at that point in the show. Though for us viewers, it does seem like Sasha has it in the bag. I am wondering though, Sasha was whispering something to BachieQueen when she was pinning the rose to his shirt. Does anyone know or are amazing lip readers and can tell me what he was whispering? It was a little weird and awkward, but I am curious to know what it was regardless of how mawkish it was!!  I still can't work out who else in this bag of mixed nuts could work with BachieQueen as well as Sasha does. A concern I do hold for Sasha, is he has to keep his cool while BachieQueen spends time and pashes the other suitors. Will he keep it together or will he find it difficult and let the jealousy get the better of him?

While there was no kiss to steam up the screens on the single date, Sasha managed to get over the first date jitters and at the cocktail party was whisked away by BachieQueen to a private area of the mansion. It was certain that a kiss was to follow, however poor Sasha was struggling to find his moment. It was at this point that was I truly worried for him. Was he a good kisser? Why would he delay his pash, was his kisses of the past like this...

or like this perhaps?

Thankfully, Sash managed to ask for permission which it was granted and the kiss was nothing like the above possibilities, though there was a moment there where it could have been like the second one!!! ;)

The only other suitor I am considering a good runner up at this point in the game is Sandragon's little bro Davey. Though he hasn't really been able to be himself since he messed things up in Episode 1. He is trying a little too hard at this point in the show, and I hope he manages to shed this awkward skin he has created to protect himself and reveal the 'real' Davey, and not act like a d-i-c-k like his father told him not to!!

Hang on though, don't let me forget there is one more that could sweep BachieQueen off her feet..

Rose Ceremony 

Luckily I couldn't tell if BachieQueen's hair was shorter this episode, but none the less it became awfully clear that OwlMan has fallen too deeply too quickly and BachieQueen being the nice girl that she is released him back into the world to meet up with his Owl friends.

Episode 4

Single date this week goes to #SirAlex. I am not quite sure what it is, but SirAlex seems to act and dress a little above his age bracket. Maybe he really thinks that the maturity card will win BachieQueen's heart. Well it kind of worked because BachieQueen keeps referring to him as being totes mature. Those grandpa jumpers are working their charm! However this is all that comes to mind for now...

Despite what I think though, BachieQueen gives #SirAlex a rose and he lives another week to share more of his grandpa wardrobe!!

Group Date

Those that scored the group date get to play dodge ball at #FlipOut. This is a good way to bring out the competitive male ego for sure! It quickly becomes real when Richie and Davey are chosen as team captains and Richie choose his, let's just call it like it is shall we? The dorks. While Davey chooses his preferred mates and considers  his team, the 'Not Dorks' and pretty much should smash 'The Dorks'!!  It is at this point however that Will gets to reveal is oddly manly physique which is out of proportion to the rest of his overall and bandana clad body. Someone along the way has encouraged Will to work out so that Bachie Queen will add that onto the list of his endearing qualities so he can remain in the BachieMansion one more rose ceremony. I do have to add here though that Will is all sorts of oddness but in an endearing way. I am not sure there are many men out there who can sport not just a pair of denim overalls, a cardigan, and a bandanna in the one outfit and be serious. Who wears bandanas like that these days?

Oh, ok then!

As it worked out "The Dorks" happened to win the dodge ball game and scored alone time in a Turkish Bath, which was unfortunately completely full of awkwardness. This mini group date really should have been a single with Richie, which eventually was towards the end, but we had to watch men applying special mud on each other and Bachie Queen exfoliating Will with an oven mitt to get there!!

Cocktail Party

The unofficial theme for this party became who could give BachieQueen the dopest present? Since they have known each other for like ages and ages in teenage years, they are now up to gift giving in order to win her affections. That being said, I'm not biased or anything, Sasha's gift however cheesy  it may seem was the nicest of the evening, compared to the others.

Enter our favourite non-bachie, like ever, who informs the Bachies that 2 dudes will be going home tonight..

There are no prizes for the most obvious picks tonight. Will who smiles like he is the Joker with no make up was sent home and a nice looking fella with blond hair leaves too! My hat goes off to Will, while he is not BachieQueen's cup of red wine, we got to know him and discover that while he is an oddball, he is a nice guy. The other guy who left, I have no idea who he is and what he stands for so good on you Will!

PS. How many men do you know who drink tea at male gatherings??

PPS. No Bachiette Treat this week, I was camping when the shows aired and I have just watched them on TenPlay.

Missed a Recap?

Bachelorette Australia Recap Episode 2
Bachelorette Australia Recap Episode 1
The Bachelor Australia Season 3 Finale Recap

Thursday, September 24, 2015

The Bachelorette Australia Recap Episode 2 #BachietteTreat

Episode 2

What a golden episode this was! Wow, where do I start? Well I should really start at the end because this is where all the juicy bits happened, but incase you didn't see it at all, I will give you a run down on what lead up to an 'intense'{said in a ladyman voice} evening. 

Single Date

Dave the plumber scored the single date. Bachie Frost likes him coz he's a good "aussie bloke" and he is but he kind of reminds me of..

but he doesn't have a mullet {sad face}. BachieQueen loves how he says all the "genuine Aussie type bloke" stuff like referring to Bachie Queen as a 'bird', wha? All jokes aside, he does seem like a noice guy and he does come across like he is being himself, which is refreshing. In years to come we can only hope for this...

 As for the date, they went to the SCG, which is totally a 'bloke's paradise', right? They are taken there in a black helicopter, because that is a 'blokie' colour, right? They meet a cricketer and play cricket, because that is a 'blokes' game, right? I am getting the hint that Channel 10 has done some research and discovered all the stereotypical things 'blokes' like and tried to squeeze it into a single date. Anyway, the night ends with BachieFrost giving David the plumber a rose. I'm still not convinced he is the one, #teamsasha all the way! 

Group Date

Davey, Alex, and Will are left behind on the group date. The other bachies head to a river and are told they must jump of a cliff to prove their manliness to BachieFrost. This is where I can't crack any jokes. I am completely afraid of heights and jumping from heights totally cripples me with fear. However, they all do it, except for OwlMan, he can't bring himself to jump and for his bravery of admitting he couldn't he scored some alone time with BachieFrost. I was happy for OwlMan up until he went a little creepy and started expressing how he went a little crazy when his ex-girlfriend dumped him and how much he has totally fallen for BachieFrost, it was a little like...

If BachieFrost's hair looks uneven next week, we should be very concerned, v-e-r-y- c-o-n-c-e-r-n-e-d!

Cocktail Party

I should have mentioned that ModelDavid was a little miffed by the group date because he too was scared of heights and had never worn a scuba suit before. He tried new things for BachieFrost, but did she notice? No, she was too taken with OwlMan's bravery. Naturally, this hurt his feelings and he started questioning himself...

Poor ModelDavid had a hard time working this out. He thought by jumping off the cliff he was the man BachieFrost would want, but he didn't score the alone time. So he went a little weird and started causing trouble, thinking it would score him points. He found his inner confidence that was telling him...

This gave him the strength he needed. However, it came out all wrong to the viewers and the other 'blokes'. He broke the #brocode and cut in on Micheal the Soccer dude's time and made things completely awkward, kind of like when Sandragon interrupted alone time between BachieWood and Sarah.  That was a moment that should never be repeated! Eventually he got some alone time with BachieFrost, and the first thing he did was tell her how much 'gangsta' was in him and gave her some baseball cap or something. Now DavidtheModel, I know you try to act gangsta and all but this is all I see..

Then he proceeds to tell BachieFrost to be weary of Micheal the Pro soccer dude because he thinks he is a playa, not just a player (haha that was mine!) which did not go down well with BachieFrost. So she is all like, "what do you think I need in a man"? This is where ModelDavid just crashed and burned in model style. He claimed that BachieFrost needed a good "baby daddy" and someone who looks good in clothes. Ahem...

It is at this point that I think, this douche is so going home tonight! Cut to the rose ceremony and as we all picked it, ModelDavid did not get a rose. However, this douche is not going home without having the last word. He proceeds to tell BachieQueen some dribble about how he thinks she has miss-judged him and says some not so clazzy things. What is this douche's problem? Nobody is impressed with this outburst, not even Oshie who looks like he wants to drop kick him out of the Bachie Mansion. What is wrong with this guy? It is almost like he has taken his inner gangsta a little too seriously. He be like..

but we be like...

Anyway, one David down, two more to go! When I think about DavidtheModel, all I see now is.. 

and finally....

Let's hope he works it out and realises there really, really, really, has to be more to life. 

#BachietteTreat tonight is Caramel and Chocolate Crepe Cake with banana and strawberry. 

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

The Bachelorette Australia Recap Episode 1

Episode 1

I'm feeling like there is a bit of de ja vu with this whole show. First of all, the Bachelorette is Sam, same as The Bachelor. They are back at the Bachie Mansion, do we call it Bachie Prison now? Or Man Prison? The Bachelors themselves resemble the Bachie Girls and did I see a promo of Sam and her Bachie Guy walking down a row of grape vines in a vineyard, recycled {cough}. To be fair there are some things that are kind of same same but different. The Bachie Guys sip from green goblets instead of red or red fringed goblets. Unless you are Dave the plumber, who drinks his beer from a glass vase.

Basically we are introduced to the Bachelors, and those who are going to stay for at least a couple episodes get a back story. This is how I saw things.

Alex is 35 and is a financial consultant. He is fluent in British, which is super thick like jam on scones when he speaks to Bachie Frost, but when he is with the dudes it's like the proper way to spread vegemite on toast! He reminds me of this....

 or maybe this....

Sasha is the guy who made a very good first impression on Bachie Frost, she even gave him a first impressions rose. This is when he was like...

I would be very shocked if Sasha didn't make it to the final two.

David is the the international model and how could we forget this important piece of information. He managed to mention it like a million times throughout the whole episode. His impressive line to Bachie Frost, " I was born in Poland, so I have a European passport, that will come in handy for you so we can tour Europe easily" or something along those lines. All I could think was...

I could actually spend most of this post sharing gifs that came to mind for poor David. Like this one...

Anyway, let's move on. The other David is called Dave and he is a plumber and he drinks his beer from glass vases. There must be something manly about this or maybe he is collecting his roses in the vases or something. All jokes aside, he seems like a down to earth guy. His dream date would be a good steak at a pub and good conversation. Need I say more?

There is yet another David, but to avoid confusing the viewers or Bachie Frost,  he has been christened  Davey. He is a carpenter and I swear his older sister is...

Richie is a Rope Technician Specialist. I don't know, Google it!!  Richie is all the way from Perth WA and he has a lot to share...

But I also got this vibe....

Kieran is an Exercise Physiologist. The occupation titles keep getting better! I don't remember much about this guy, but he did get a rose and this is what came to mind....

Let's see where this talent takes him!!

Will is a Musician from Western Australia. He is all like....

He is not going to last more than a couple of episodes, but he makes Bachie Frost laugh. Need I say more?

Micheal is a professional football (soccer) player from Queensland. He has taken timeout from his busy professional career to try and snag himself a lady on a reality TV show. Wha? Is it just me, or does this guy feel a little disgenuine? Why do we need to see a him having a shower, what has that got to do with anything? I'm thinking...

Drew is a Sleep Technician, yes, its a real job...apparently. I'm thinking very generously... owl. That is all you needed Drew to leave an impression on Bachie Frost. Kind of weird but memorable none the less.

So this is about as far as my memory will care to extend as to who is in the running for Bachie Frost's affection. Then my favourite non-bachie shows up and while I used Barbie Ken to depict Osher in The Bachelor Recaps, I am thinking I need to man it up a little to match the testosterone that is gushing through the mansion. Osher is in da house....

Osher generously share's his mathematical talents and informs us, which we would not have known without the passionate duty to share his genius mind, that two gentleman are leaving tonight. The dude that turned up in a happy shirt and super large skateboard goes home and some other guy, I have no idea who he is.

The Bachelor Austral Season 3 Recaps
Recap Finale
Recap Episode 14
Recap Episode 13
Recap Episode 12
Recap Episode 11
Recap Episode 10
Recap Episode 9
Recap Episode 7& 8
Recap Episode 5 &6
Recap Episode 4
Recap Episode 3
Recap Episode 1&2

Monday, September 21, 2015

The Bachelor Australia Season 3 Recap Finale

Episode 15

A very belated recap of the final two seasons. Life has been unkind with sickness and crazy children. I was absent for the majority of this episode airing but my Twitter friends basically said not much happened. I really should have taken their word for it. However I still felt the need to watch it on TenPlay. Here is what I thought about this episode.

Sarah was sent home and I so wish her exit went a little like this...

Episode 16 - FINALE

Many are thinking that Llama, who I feel is a little disgenuine and I am positive has a herd of cats living in her cellar at home, is going to be proposed to. But in my heart of hearts, at the beginning of this episode, I am seriously hoping that he proposes to Snez. She is a classy and attractive woman who openly loves food, what more could a man want? My husband is happy with this!!

We watch Bachie have a thinkie think about his task ahead, when in all honesty I am hoping he will break out into a...

A dancey dance would be so much more entertaining than a thinky think all the time. But I do have to remember that BachieWood has a big task on his hands and we should give him the chance to....

Anyway, each girl is bought home to meet Bachie's family. I really felt as though Snez had a great connection with his dad but then Llama seemed to have a good connection with his sister. The battle was on, Snez made his dad cry versus Llama who made his sister cry.

Bachie takes each of his girls on separate dates (thank goodness, it wasn't a final group date, that would have been awks). He leaves all of us thinking it could be either lady as he pashes both intensely. But only one girl can win, unless he has thoughts of moving overseas and joining the FLDS (think Sister Wives).

Anyway, we are brought back to the Bachie Mansion where there is a tonne of candles burning away in every nook and cranny that a burning candle can be placed. What is with the flamin' (punny) candles in this show? Did a producer find a shipping container of candles on Ebay for .99c and thought they would be funny and bid and accidentally win? I am so over candles, they no longer have a romantic connection for me...

While I fume about this sad reality, I am settled when my favourite non-Bachie shows up...

Osher in da house! Whoop Whoop!! But them my glee turns into sadness, because there is no dirty rose ceremony math to share. What else does he do, if he doesn't talk rose ceremony math?? He says something, but without numbers, it is meaningless to me. When he finally leaves, no doubt to hit the math books in preparation for the next season, I realise that the car that rolls up will be the girl who doesn't get the rose. Please be crazy cat person, please be crazy cat person....and it is!! Yeeehaa!! I am so glad he has made the right choice!! But then I do have a moment of sadness for poor Llama, no doubt she did feel like that ring was meant to be hers.  Bachie's break up speech went a little like this I think...

No doubt Llama if she could have her time back she would have been a bit like...


It's ok Llama, as I am pretty sure you are a crazy cat person in your 'real' life you can go  home to the comfort of your cellar cats again and be like....

It's all good Llama, you will find a man who will embrace those cats and will let you choose your own ring!!!

Then all sounds fade as Snez arrives and we all know what is going to happen next. Bachie gets out his {let's face it people it was unattractive} #ZAMELS ring and is all like....

So now it's like:
Sam and Snez sitting in a tree
First comes love
Then comes marriage
Then comes a(nother) baby sitting in a carriage!!!

Recap Episode 14
Recap Episode 13
Recap Episode 12
Recap Episode 11
Recap Episode 10
Recap Episode 9
Recap Episode 7& 8
Recap Episode 5 & 6
Recap Episode 4
Recap Episode 3
Recap Episode 1& 2
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...